"I copy that" is walkie-talkie talk for - I understand, will do, gotcha, ok, alright, yup, uh-huh, and much more depending on the inflection of the voice.

Friday, December 30, 2005

Halloween.

I was Mario and my best friend was luige. Red suit, overalls – the whole shabang. I was 22 and had just moved to New York. We were accompanied by female Ghost Busters, Jersey trash, and a flamboyant gay man on roller-skates. The night went according to plan, there were drinks, dancing, drinks, flirting, drinks, kissing, and an impromptu ride back to the Ghost Buster’s apartment in a stretch limousine. We lost roller-boy at some point in the evening to the drinks and he skated off home before we got to there. We gave him a set of keys. After buying three large pizzas we approached the door to the world of settling.

Roller-Boy had the only set of keys. He left them in the apartment, locked in the apartment. 3:45am Locked out of the apartment. No one else was home in the building. There was talk of Locksmiths, no one on those fancy sticker they place next to the locks were answering. 411 had no help either. What was Mario to do? Why - he was go climb up the castle walls.

He went around the corner until he found a escape ladder 4 buildings away. Jumped from a staircase railing and pulled himself on to the first landing. His overalls and red cap continued up to the top landing. The escape did not go all the way to the roof, but the final landing was only a window away from an adjoining rooftop. If Mario got the big star with the super speed he could vault from the landing to the window to the roof four floors above ground.

He did not have the special star. However, the window to the apartment was open and the lights were off, if he went inside the apartment and out the window he could easily reach the roof next door.
“Hello? Helloooo?”
Push the window open, right foot in, lean over, swing torso around, left foot in. Up down up down, left right, left right A B, A B, select start. The cheats were put into the program for a reason. Mario was in the hidden level, the music speeds up, there is no one chasing him there are TV shaped stars and stereo shaped stars everywhere, but there isn’t time… there is an extra bonus for speed.

He goes straight into the hallway, turns left and goes toward a door. He turns left into the door into the special bedroom chamber… still no princess, he has a long way to go. He goes to the window – opens it and steps onto the ledge. Holding onto the window dangling floors above the mysterious emptiness that we all know leads to death (he is on his last man, and can’t afford to fail). He leans over and slightly jumps horizontally onto the next rooftop. Pressing the A button he runs from one roof to the next, climbs a short wall to the next, and to the final rooftop.

The door is locked.

This must be the wrong tube.

He looks for another tube, there is one towards the back of the building, it leads to a patio where the treasure is kept two floors down. He shimmies between the vent and the wall. Success.

The door is locked.

The window is unlocked; he opens it, breaks through the flimsy screen and is in. He goes to the intercom and presses the magic button and says the password, “comeonup”. And he has released the princesses – the Ghost Busters have their castle back.

mario luigi

...there is a reason I didn't finish my novel...

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